Ok. There. I said it! The cat is out of the bag. I'm married and I still date. But, before you grab the pitchforks and burning stakes... let me explain.
My hair is done, my makeup is applied, I have a skirt with a blue button down shirt on that I haven't worn for years... and butterflies have taken over my stomach. "Will he think I'm sexy?" "Does he even like me in this color!?" "Did I put on too much makeup??" "Are my teeth white enough?" ... the usual things are going through my head as I nervously apply the last touch of lipstick and wait for him to see me. My thoughts shift quickly to wondering what he's going to wear; will I like it? What will we talk about over lunch?
I look up and I see him standing there in all of his masculine glory with a blue button down shirt, jeans, jewelry I've given him as gifts, hair slicked back and beard neatly kept... my husband. Goodness does he look sexy. I take in the sight from toe to hair and I'm just in awe; THIS is the man I get to spend my life with. THIS is the man I get to forever date.
He grabs my hand, kisses it gently and asks if I'm ready before giving me a spin around and saying "DAMN Rosey. You look hot!" I'll take it! Hot is definitely great in his book and that means the nerves can go down.. just a little. Then I hear two little giggles coming from the hallway as our sweet kiddos are standing there watching mommy and daddy interact as if we're in a movie. They both saw us dressed up and immediately ran to their room, grabbed out their best outfits and put them on. For Zophie a lace dress and for Zayne, a brown suit topped with a vest.
While we're driving to drop the kiddos off for some alone time, I can't stop looking at him. In our six years of being together, I've never been more in love with this man. It just grows more and more every single day.
At lunch, I sat across from him, catching quick heart-racing eye-locked stares. I love the way he looks at me; and it's not just today, but every day! You see, when we first started dating, we were B.R.O.K.E broke! Like, grab a bucket of chicken and sit on the dock as a date broke. We have literally made it from absolutely nothing to here.. and I'm so thankful. That journey has made me love him even more and I cherish our dates. I cherish this man... more than words can even say. I LOVE that he still takes the time to date me.. to earn my love.. to remind me how special I am to him.
While we may not be perfect and there are some days that we both are ran to the core, I wouldn't and couldn't imagine spending my life with anyone else. He brings a completion to my heart that was once a void. And I'm sure you're probably reading this and wondering why on earth I'm even sharing it to begin with.
Well, the truth is - I have a lot of teen subscribers on my blog, instagram and fb. I also have a lot of single males and single females who follow me on social media. How selfish would it be to go without utilizing the reach I have to spread something positive?
You see, movies will tell you that you need a whirlwind romance like The Notebook and you can fantasize over men stripping down to next to nothing in Magic Mike... but know where the fairytales end and where real life begins.
NOTHING is sexier to me than when I look over and see my husband cleaning, cooking, playing with our children or just looking back to me with that sexy side-smirk he does. Nothing is sexier than when he's at work and he sends me sweet "I miss you" texts. Nothing is sexier than when he goes to the store and grabs some of my favorite snacks after I've had a rough day. Nothing is sexier than when he rubs my back because it hurts. Nothing is sexier than when he runs a hot bubble bath for me, pours me an ice cold glass of Moscato and bathes me from head to toe just so I can feel pampered for once. And let me tell you.. NOTHING is sexier than his J.O.B. job. And it's not about the money. It's because I know he loves our family enough to go in, bust his tail at his job and give his best effort because he wants to make sure we have every desire we could ever want, met.
How do I show my husband just how much I love him? Well.. I date him. I constantly pursue him and show him just how much he's loved. I massage his back when he's had a long night at work. I wake him up to his favorite breakfast randomly. I pick up the check instead of always making him do it. I wear that hot little leopard number he loves so much to bed so when he comes in from work, he'll see me sleeping in it. I write love notes and slip them in his wallet to find. I buy him things I know he wants but puts on the back burner because he puts us first. I shoot sexy little text messages and pics to him while he's working just to let him know I can't wait until he comes home. I try to take care of myself and dress myself up on special occasions just to remind him of what he has; just the same as he does for me! I reassure him when he's down, I uplift him when he's losing his way, I hold his hand in prayer and lift his name to God every single chance I get. I cater to his needs just the same as he does mine and even when I find his interests not as fun as my own.. I still do them. Why? Because I love him... ALL of him.
So guys, if you're reading this - it truly isn't about looks, abs, your "package" or how much bank you bring in ... it's about how you love your partner. It's about how you treat them. And ladies & guys.. if you have someone who does these things for you, meet them half way. In fact, make it a 60/40... if they do something for you, do double back. Why? Because love isn't about how much they wait on you or how much jewelry they buy you. It's about true, honest feelings for one another. It's about those nights when your kids have been cranky beyond measure but you both manage to still laugh as you fall asleep in one another's arms. It's about the moments that steal your breath. It's about building a relationship filled with laughter, tears, hard work and play time.
It's about knowing that no matter what happens in the end, you can say you gave it your all... even if it starts with a simple date.